... the reason life works at all is that not everyone in your tribe is nuts on the same day (Anne Lamott)

On today's run, I began to smile as I knocked the miles down and I was reminded of my tribe.  My tribe consists of 5 families that these days don't see each other as much as we used to but nonetheless, we have basically grown up together.  We met when I had a 2 month old baby and pre-baby me was really still a kid. Motherhood was the catalyst to adulthood for me.  And these friends have weathered me trying to figure it out and still love me.  And I have weathered them working to figure it out and I still love them.  I have hurt their feelings and they have hurt mine at times, but real forgiveness is always there and we move on with our hearts open to real friendship.

Even my gmail account knows who my tribe is.  I type one name in and it has this cool new feature that suggests other names that often are emailed in conjunction with the first name - and every time when I email 1 tribe member, all 4 other families pop up as suggestions to include...and I almost always do.

We never claim to have the answers or to have arrived.  Instead we recognize that we are always on a journey working on understanding ourselves, God, parenthood, life.

I love my tribe because I have never witnessed any of us ever putting anyone down.  It's just not how we roll.  It's friendships built on the belief that none of us know what we are doing and we are OK to help each other figure things out, and change, and figure some more things out, and change again.

I love how safe it feels to have friends like this that accept and give space for me to not be perfect. 

I am sorry that this world is full of so many chatty, degrading people but thankfully, I have been able to surround myself with an amazing tribe.

Wherever you are, it is your friends who make your world.- William James

Am I surrounded by King Davids or King Sauls

King Saul was a mad king for sure. He raised David as his own son with a fierce love that turned to jealousy, hatred, and murderous intentions. King David was a humble follower, turned leader. He was pursued to be murdered by his father figure and David never fought back or attempted to hurt Saul. He had opportunities to kill Saul, and save his own life, and always chose to give mercy.

Spears get thrown all the time - gossip, looks, rude comments to name a few of the spears - and we have 2 choices: pick the spear up and throw it back or dodge the spear and refuse to seek our own revenge.

Choosing to throw the spear in return might elevate you to leadership but it does so by turning you into the very leader that threw the spear at you in the first place. The only way to break that cycle and be a true leader is to lay the spear down.

Simplified: keep the mouth shut, keep the heart soft, keep the mind pure.

Am I surrounded by King David

Lessons for King David

Years ago, this book prevented my husband and I from walking a precarious and heart breaking situation with the wrong spirit. It forced us to do the simple yet deeply challenging act of staying quiet when the fleshly spirit demands that we stomp our feet and seek our own paths to justice.

Without the truths that King David taught through example I tend to say too much, demand too much, seek justice, and attempt to dethrone those in my life that God Has put in authority.

With the truths of King David, I have learned to simply not throw the spear that was thrown at me and I have yet to regret staying quiet.

The Freedom we feel in the mountains

Christmas Letter 2011

From Nicaragua

to the top of Tumalo mountain a few days ago

we have had an amazing year. Every year seems like a better one then the last, and this one is no exception. It's been such a full year that somehow the news that we sold our home (in 5 days!) in September barely even made the list to be mentioned here!

Cory is working hard to develop and implement the engineering program at Redmond High School, as the department head. He loves the hands on classes he is teaching that inspire kids to come in during their lunch and groan when class ENDS. Julie continues to teach High school Spanish, elementary music, and piano at Central Christian School (and in our private home studio) where Cade and Bekah are 5th and 3rd graders. Both kids have found a love for soccer and are progressing nicely on the piano (and a little guitar!). My big project of the year culminated on Dec. 14th, with our elementary Christmas musical of 2 showings to a crowd of at least 700 folks that watched us sing, dance, and act out the truth that it truly is better to give than receive!

Our summer adventures began on June 20th when we hooked up the trailer and said goodbye to our home for a 10 week life on the road. It started in Zion National Park for 10 days. Then off to Nicaragua for 3 weeks. After Nica, we "convalesced" at Bryce National Park as Nica was quite exhausting. It was nice to get home to safe water, food, dry air, and our own vehicle after giving 110% for 3 weeks.

We then enjoyed a 5 week stay in Eastern California where we backpacked over 150 miles in the Sierras and camped in between trips. Nothing beats the Sierras for the O'Neills!!



Our mission trip in Nicaragua for 3 weeks was life changing, to say the least! It is our sincere prayer that we will get to return in a summer. I loved being able to connect with the locals through Spanish conversation and Bible schools I lead but it was amazing to watch all 4 of us discover our niche there. The kids played with the kids day after day as if they knew Spanish - Love knows no language! Cory and I got to spend a day fitting folks with eye glasses and never grew tired of watching faces of young and old light up when we found the right prescription and they could see for the first time! Cory also spent about 10 days working on an orphanage property installing solar panels - this was not pre planned. We heard about the orphanage, gave them a quick call, showed up and found that they had been praying for an engineer to come and help them with this project (and needed a worship leader too which Cory enjoyed doing in the evenings). Cade helped daddy a lot while Bekah and I played with the kids, led a Bible school, and helped in the kitchen.



Here's the main solar tower completed and ready to be anchored in the ground:The truth about short term mission trips is that it allows us to go to a different part of the planet and see a different face of God in the lives of those that live there. We did get to do some amazing hands on helping type projects, but the real lessons were the ones our hearts learned through the gracious people we met while there.

With all these epic trips, some of the best memories are contained in the simple essence of those moments when we deeply connect with someone -(Bullfrog lake below: another 12,000 foot lunch at an exquisite lake!) holding hands with Cade as we walk across a campground, a killer run that gets the sweat pouring, going out to coffee with a friend, a hug from a student, tea time with Bekah or a quick surprise visit from someone all weave the days together with true joy. We do feel so blessed at our full and bountiful life and for your friendship in our lives. May you have an amazing 2012, where you seize each day with joy and hope.

Love, the O'Neills
Cory, Julie, Cade, and Bekah

2012 - here we come!

She packed up her potential

and all she had learned,

grabbed a cute pair of shoes

and headed out to

change a few things